I want a national anthem which:

1 - Doesn't mention 'Mountains', 'lochs', or any other kind of rural beauty.
2 - isn't in archaic Scots that nobody really understands ("Scots Wha Hae' . . .who actually speaks like that?)

This rules out the Highland Cathedral lyrics, and also that other favourite, the Freedom Come-all-ye, which is virtually incomprehensible.

I would have suggested Big Country's 'In A Big Country' as a suitable anthem, but it fails test one because of all the lover's voice down a mountainside stuff.

Malcolm Middleton's 'We're all going to Die' would make a suitable non-nationalistic, fatalistic national anthem, plus you could dance to it.

We are an ironic, wry, self-depecrating nation. Let's have those qualities reflected in our anthem, and none of this 'beautiful hills aye wha hae' nonsense.

P.s.

You don't have to be a 'feminist' to find 'a man's a man' exclusive. you just have to be female.

Nothing wrong with Flower o'Scotland.

Better than Scotland the Brave or some of the others they suggested!
I have got used to hearing Highland Cathedral, but I have already got fed up of hearing it.

Bob,

Judging by yer icon, ye need tae eat more!!

d......I worked in China 2001-2004 as an ESL teacher. On the first week of each month, I would teach my (teenage) students a song.

Of the songs that I taught them, the one they loved most was 'Flower of Scotland'. They loved the tune, the words, and the history behind it.

'Flower of Scotland' was the ONLY item that the students ever asked me about outside classroom hours.... 'nuff said....