I just thought I'd introduce myself. I'm from the East End of Glasgow originally, but moved to London in 1990, and then to Spain in 1998 when my other half took early retirement. I still have the vague notion that one day I'll move back to Scotland.

As well as just about anything related to Scotland and Scottish politics, being gay I'm also very interested in lesbian and gay issues. I'm always happy to answer anyone's honest questions about gay issues. (I don't bite - not unless A. you ask nicely, and B. you're kinda cute.)

My big obsession however is language and linguistics, especially the history and development of Scottish languages. So if anyone would like a discussion on any aspect of Scottish linguistic history, I'm up for it. I can be quite opinionated about human evolution, archaeology, ancient history and anthropology too.

My ID is a term from human population genetics. It refers to the fact I've been told I was a strange mutant gene.

Cheers,

InfrequentAllele

Hiya and welcome!

We've already met in the chatroom today, so don't be a stranger!

I look forward to reading yer future posts, a'ra best!

Hi IA

Welcome aboard.

I hope you enjoy yourself here - we hold a wide range of opinion but generally we all respect that and get on with each other. (I did say generally

All the best.

TLJ

Hi and welcome it seems we will call you IA which will be less typing. Enjoy the site. The threads are lively but mostly civilised.

You met DWS in the chatroom

"As well as just about anything related to Scotland and Scottish politics, being gay I'm also very interested in lesbian and gay issues. I'm always happy to answer anyone's honest questions about gay issues. (I don't bite - not unless A. you ask nicely, and B. you're kinda cute.)"

Hi Allele

I have an honest question. I'm heterosexual and I'd like to know why so many gay people seem to want to make that an issue themselves. For instance I don't introduce myself and mention my sexual preferences. I don't generally tend to have gay issues either just like I never meet people with heterosexual issues. I have gay friends I've been honest with about this and said to them, if all you're after is not to be treated differently then why make such a big deal about it yourself?

Welcome to Scotsgait.

Hi IA,
Good to meet you and I hope you enjoy this site as much as I do. It's a great bunch of people on here and I'm looking forward to reading your views.
Meg

May I also add my welcome InfrequentAllele, and I hope you will be a frequent poster.

Hello IA, welcome to Scotsgait.

I think you'll find it quite lively here and there's always something new to comment on or chat about.

Thanks for the welcomes.

I'm happy to answer your question Clare. The reason so many gay people introduce ourselves as gay is because we live in a society where people are generally assumed to be heterosexual. Heterosexual people constantly "out" themselves as heterosexual; every time you mention a wife/husband/boyfriend/girlfriend you make a public statement about your heterosexuality.

Because there is a general assumption that people are straight unless you know otherwise (in lesbian and gay politics this is called heterosexism), straight people are able to make casual references to their sexual orientation without realising that they're doing so. When a female work colleague says - "I went to the cinema with my boyfriend last night to see the new Batman movie" she has made a public identification of herself as heterosexual.

It's the same when you meet people socially for the first time. The information you give about yourself to new acquaintances will invariably include reference to a husband or wife if you're married, or a boyfriend or girlfriend if you're in a relationship. So in fact straight people do constantly mention their sexual orientation. (Being gay or straight isn't a sexual preference though. A preference is whether you want to do it with the lights on or off.)

A statement like "I went to see the Batman movie with my boyfriend" is not going to provoke a discussion about homosexuality for a straight woman, or worse, provoke bigoted remarks and hostility. It will provoke a discussion about the movie. But for a gay man to make a similar seemingly innocuous statement about going to a movie with his boyfriend, in a group of people who don't know he's gay, is to risk potential problems.

I'm not complaining about it, it's just a simple fact of life. There are more straight people than gay people.

I don't introduce myself as gay when I meet people face to face. I just operate on the assumption that everyone already knows. I came out as gay back in the 1980s when I still lived in Easterhouse. I learned to develop a thick skin and a good sense of humour. It's obvious I'm a guy, and it becomes obvious that I'm gay when I make a casual reference to my partner.

Online it's a wee bit different, especially if you use an ID like mine which is gender neutral. I find it's better to tell people right away, which spares the need for explanations further down the line. I don't consider it making an issue out of my sexuality.

I hope that answers your question!

Cheers

Thanks for the response and I'm afraid it didn't really answer the question. You see I think my sexual orientation is pretty irrelevant as is everyone else's. It really isn't the issue. And at the moment I'm not in a relationship so your example kind of bombs there. What does that make me, not anything? Or is there something I should say on meeting new people to let them know whether I'm gay or straight? You see? Like I said I'm not going to refer to a husband or a boyfriend right now am I? So do I leave them wondering or should I drop hints. If this sounds absurd its because I think it is. If we're attempting to live in a world where sexual orientation is down to the person deciding about it then why make it such a big deal?

And I'm not homophobic incidentally. I just think it is all quite unnecessary as is the "lesbian and gay politics" thing. As I said before if you want to blend why the need for lesbian and gay politics? I'm a general politics person and I'm concerned about people without worrying about their sexual orientation. And with respect bigotted remarks are par for the course in many areas of life not just sexual orientation.

So....how was Batman?

dws wrote:
So....how was Batman?

Hi Clare,

The example I gave was not meant to be taken literally. With all due respect, you're completely missing the point. I've already tried explaining it, so let's just leave it there.

A person's sexual orientation ought to be irrelevant, I am in complete agreement with you, but you're talking about an ideal world. That's not the world we live in. Lesbian and gay political achievements have made an immense difference to my life in a huge number of ways. I'm sure these same achievements haven't altered your life in the slightest, but then there is no reason why they should. It's very easy to consider that something is "unnecessary" when it doesn't have any impact on you personally.

But I didn't actually join this forum to discuss lesbian and gay politics. I'm happy to answer questions people have, and I prefer to get them out of the way at the beginning. Then I can get back to talking about the Batman movie, or the price of petrol, or the impending end of the United Kingdom which is my favourite comedy viewing at the moment.

And I've still not been able to see Batman. ("I hate anything with that Heath Ledger in it" - quote from my other half.) We went to see Journey to the Center of the Earth instead. Don't bother. To say the acting is wooden is an insult to trees. I've seen more expressive larches.

hello and welcome...InfrequentAllele

I'm glad you are here with us...and open to discussion...tell me why...I am always persude by women since I was in jr high...my boyfriend almost beat up a girl because she got upset that I cut my hair and was holding me from behind...even the mother of a friend of mines...Even now at work and going out...

I'm heterosexual...very by the way...
So don't try to tell, I'm in the closet...tell me something is it that normal...David (gay) my friend wants to change every straight man he sees...to him they are gay...but don't know it, I have never seen him act like these women...I love him too much so I just smack him once...

Hi Maria, I dunno why women keep pursuing you. Maybe you're just irrestistible to lesbians?

Your friend David sounds like some gay friends of mine who are convinced that the difference between a straight man and a bisexual is approximately 6 pints of beer.

I don't agree with that theory.

It's more like 9 pints and a couple of vodkas.